Everybody has an inner dialogue in their head. You know the conversations that you have in your head but nobody else hears … or NEEDS to hear! For example, when you do your mental checklist before going out the door: wallet, keys, cellphone, check! Okay maybe this is not the best example because I know many people say that checklist out loud because it helps them remember … but you are also usually alone. Do you know when you don’t need to say everything out loud? When you’re at the grocery store. I was behind a woman last night that said out loud everything she saw and was doing. Upon being rung up she started talking incessantly. “Oh! Did I get that one? I didn’t want that one. Just ring it up and I’ll go get the other one. I have my Uber outside and I don’t want to make them wait. I’ll just get the Salisbury Steak. Oh, how much did that ring up as? Did I get the discounted price?” Holy shit, I don’t think she even came up for air! Then she went to pay and started reading the instructions on the card reader screen. This is verbatim what came out of her mouth – “Insert card. Okay, I’m inserting my card … Cash back? No, I don’t want cash back … Total. Yes, that’s the total … Processing. Okay, processing.” And before you start trying to make excuses for her like “…maybe she had mental problems? Did you think of that?” She didn’t have any fucking disabilities. She is just one of those annoying people who loves to hear her own voice and thinks everybody else wants to also. News flash! I don’t. This interaction at the grocery store is something that almost everybody does and they don’t feel the need to give the play by play! Last time you went to the grocery store, did the person in front of you act like this? I’m guessing not or you would have definitely remembered. They probably ran their card, waited patiently and then had a pleasant exchange of Thank You with the clerk. They didn’t announce every action they were doing. Do you know why they call it an “inner dialogue?” Because it’s in your head … for only YOU to hear. When you start speaking it out loud, people start thinking your crazy … and it’s fucking annoying!
Scott Northrop 2 Minutes
Published by Scott Northrop
Just your average guy with a family and a slight tendency towards pessimism. View all posts by Scott Northrop